What is a Spiritual Director Here For?

A spiritual director is here to listen to you without judgment as you face into life's big questions -- especially where identity and spirituality intersect.
Spiritual Director

How do you feel about you right now? About God (however you might understand the Divine)? What is motivating you? Are you driven by the thing that is breaking your heart? Or is it the thing that makes you feel alive that is the impetus behind what you’re doing and how you are with yourself? What do you long for? A spiritual director is here to explore the unknowing and the knowing of life’s big questions.

‘Wondering if finding a spiritual director is a next step for you?

A spiritual director can meet you at the intersection of your identity and your spirituality: 

Who am I really and why am I here?

“We are not human beings having a spiritual experience.  We are spiritual beings having a human experience.”

~ Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

The two foundational questions that we linger with (in all of their crazy shapes and forms) are:

What brings you joy?

What breaks your heart?

They may seem like simple questions, but when you truthfully spend time and energy exploring what answers arise for you, they can be life-altering. 

It’s hard to be with these things alone, so that’s what a Spiritual Director is here for.  We’re here as a companion, confidante, and co-learner with you in that process of self-learning — not by giving advice or counsel (because we trust that only your inner teacher knows what you truly long for and need).  We’re here to ask the questions that will help you to hear your own soul.  A soul trying to come awake.  Ready to live.  Wishing to be heard.  Wanting to thrive.  What if we make space for this together?

Being heard by another

A spiritual director comes alongside you through the thick and thin of your lived experience – especially when you are questioning or exploring your spirituality and identity.  For some, it is a relief to have someone to talk to.  ‘Someone who is willing to truly listen without hijacking the conversation with their own stuff.  It can be healing just to be heard.  Growth can happen when we allow ourselves time and space to unpack our story and tend to our wounds, our joys, our own resilience.

For some of us, this can be a daunting prospect — to have someone pay attention and focus only on me for my sake.  It might feel intimidating especially if you are in a place where you are absolutely flummoxed about your own wants-desires-needs.  How can I possibly talk about something that I have no idea about?  This is what a Spiritual Director is here for

Maybe your wants-desires-needs have been set aside for the entirety of your life.  That’s not rare, especially in women.  It is not uncommon for our whole self to be set aside for the sake of the others in our life.  Society, religion, and even family have placed so much on us that might contradict who we really are.  A Spiritual Director is here to companion you as you examine who you are by design, not just who you are “supposed” to be.  It can be challenging to face into these things alone.  As Spiritual Directors, we come along side you as a companion, confidante, and co-learner in this exploration.

Hearing your own Soul

Maybe you find yourself on unfamiliar ground where your own identity and spirituality are concerned?  What would it be like to move into the next phase of your life with a different perspective on your own identity?  A different knowing of the question, “Who am I?” 

What would it be like to move into the next phase of your life feeling differently about who you are?  Whatever that means. What would it be like to move into the next phase of your life experiencing and understanding God in a fresh way (whomever “God” might be for you)? 

Maybe it means you like yourself more. 

Maybe it means you challenge yourself more. 

Maybe it means you are less critical of yourself. 

Maybe it means you are actually more truthful about some of the shadowy corners of yourself and your life. 

Maybe it means paying attention to what all of these voices, or parts of your self are trying to tell you — the easy to embrace, and the shadowy.

It is difficult to be with these things alone, so that’s what a spiritual director is here for

Spiritual direction is not about fixing or rescuing

Nothing has to be “wrong” with you to engage in spiritual direction. While growth and deepening naturally occur in the process, people seek out a spiritual director for all kinds of reasons!

Here are just a few:

Feeling a bit purposeless, or confused.

Needing discernment about a specific issue.

Feeling feelings. Sometimes the things that have us mired don’t need full-on therapy — we just need someone to hear us out so that we can hear ourselves think.

Experiencing a disruption in faith, religious experience, or long-held beliefs.

Going through a life-altering experience like a diagnosis, a divorce, or a loved one’s death.

Big changes as you embark on the second half of life. This can be anything from an empty nest, to a major job change, to new found freedoms.

It’s important to note that spiritual direction is not a form of therapy or counseling, although it
can complement psychological and emotional well-being. While therapists focus on addressing
mental health concerns, spiritual directors concentrate on matters of the spirit, exploring deeper
questions of meaning, purpose, and connection with the divine or the transcendent.


The relationship between a spiritual director and a directee is one of trust, confidentiality, and mutual respect. Spiritual directors may have their own training and certifications through programs offered by various religious institutions, organizations, or independent spiritual director training centers. However, since the field is not regulated, there are a wide range of approaches and backgrounds among spiritual directors. There is freedom for those seeking a spiritual director to find someone whose style, beliefs, and experience align with their needs and preferences.

Inner Wisdom to Inner Wisdom — Finding a pathway home to your Self

We wonder together: What if you are not broken?  What if you are not flawed?  What if you are simply trying to find your way home — home to the truest You. The One you were before the wound.  Coming home to the part of you that cannot be traumatized, cannot be violated, cannot be destroyed. 

That’s what Spiritual Directors are here for: to companion you on that journey through the asking of open, curious, non-judgmental questions that allow you to hear your own soul. That allow you to hear your true Self.  Maybe even to hear the One you understand to be God.  You already have everything you need within you. You just need time and space to hear it.  What if that could be done in a way that was mischievous and holy and irreverent and emotional and safe?  That’s what a spiritual director is here for.

Connect for an initial meet-up! There is no cost to our first session; it is a time for you to meet us and decide if this is a good fit for you.

If you are looking for this kind of care for your church group, wellness gathering, or other small group venture, we are here to serve. Still Lake Listening curates one-time groups, weekend retreats, and multi-session retreats that run weekly over several weeks.